In May of 2014, I went in for my annual skin check. My doctor once told me that I have precancerous skin (doesn't everybody???). He took a couple of pictures and drew a couple of diagrams, them sent me on my way for another year. Shortly after that, a new mole popped up. As I had my next skin check scheduled, I ignored it.
This past May, I got a phone call that my dermatologist had left the practice and I needed to schedule a new appointment. Surprisingly, this took me a while to do. I finally made it in for this year's skin check a couple of weeks ago. We were both grateful that my previous doctor had taken such good notes and pictures so that the new one could determine if there were any changes. Apparently the areas of skin that have been radiated are extra prone to skin cancer.
Then I showed her my new mole and we decided to shave it off. Normally she would have just stuck a tiny circle bandaid on it after, but as I've had reactions to adhesives, I left her office with bandage taped to the side of my face. You know me - anything for attention.
She told me she'd call in seven days with the results.
In nine days, I got a phone call to call their office. That was a Friday. I calmly waited (aka stressed out and worried) until Monday and called them back. That began three days of phone tag. On the fourth message I left, I told them that as a cancer survivor, this was driving me nuts. "Either leave a message on my phone if I don't answer, or answer yours. Either one would be very helpful."
On Wednesday, we finally connected. Basal cell carcinoma. Won't spread to the bones. MOHS surgery. Doctor who specializes with cancers of the face.
It was that last piece that got to me. Cancers of the face. That just sounds terrifying.
So, we're scheduling surgery to get the rest of the silly thing out. And I'm looking closer at all of the other moles wondering what type of cells they're made up of...
But really, the basal cell carcinoma doesn't scare me too badly. It's little. It's not likely to spread. It's easily removed.
What's bothering me more is that this is my second diagnosis. I've already done the whole cancer thing. I did my time - read the book. I already got my cancer card. Did I really need another punch on it? Then the thought sneaks in: two cancer diagnoses by age 41. Grammy was a three time survivor, but she hadn't even had her first by 41...
This is why I'm a word person. Numbers can be terrifying.
But then, I look around at the beautiful place God prepared for me. My picture windows, library, wild grapes, and lily pond. And this is just a shadow of the Place He's preparing for me. I just need to keep trusting.
He's got this, too.
Life is good. Heaven is better. And God is in complete control.
